There ain’t room for both of us!

Put your relationship’s needs ahead of your own. For instance, if you partner feels abandoned when you leave during a fight, resist the temptation to go and stay with him. Go into another room, tell your partner you need some quiet time away from him/her, but make your relationship more important than your own need to split. If you feel the need to be alone, go into the bathroom, but don’t leave the house if it upsets your partner and makes him feel abandonned. This is not easy, but can be done and must be understood in the context of putting the relationship ahead of your own issues. Preserving the relationship is more important sometimes than giving yourself whatever you need in any given moment. Short term versus long term gratification, that’s what it boils down to. Sure, you’ll feel better momentarily when you slam the door on your way out, but it will cause damage to the relationship that will be painful and difficult to repair later on. Happy coupling!

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